It’s OK to not love everything about yourself. We’re all human. Everyone has things that they’re insecure about and would like to change. At the same time, it’s important to embrace those flaws and appreciate more what you do love about yourself. Perfection is an unattainable goal and your imperfections are what makes you unique, right?
On my last blog post – featuring my fave inspirational quotes -, I mentioned perfectionism and self-love and encouraged you to do the “my perfect imperfections” tag as a way to embrace both your blessings and your flaws. That was inspired by this video by Jenn Im. It was so refreshing to see her vulnerability chatting about her perfect imperfections so I thought it would be interesting to share my own answers with you.
Everyone has things they’re self-conscious about and this tag is all about acceptance. You pick three physical things you don’t like about yourself and three that you do like. Then, and because it’s not everything about looks, you pick one flaw and one blessing when it comes to your personality traits.
My Imperfections.
My nose.
This is something I’ve been struggling with for years and years.
I have a deviated septum which makes my nose look a bit crooked. Back in middle school, I started noticing my nose was a bit weird but, thinking I was being paranoid, I brushed it off. Then someone pointed it out to me and by her voice tone, she was clearly mocking me, which confirmed my fear – it was not just in my head. So, of course, I became more self-conscious about it.
As I grew older, it wasn’t just how my nose looked that bothered me but also not being able to breathe properly through it. So, I went to the doctor who advised me to do a surgery, which I did two years ago. Although it’s far from being perfect, as it still isn’t completely straight and I can’t breathe through my nose super well, it’s much better than it was and improved my self-confidence.
My teeth.
Well, not my teeth but my tooth.
I used braces for two years and two months and still wear my retainer every night but one of my teeth is slowly going back to the place it was and, consequently, pushing the others a tiny bit. It’s not a big deal – and you can’t really notice it unless you’re looking at my right side – but it still bothers me, especially when I take pictures.
Together with my nose (which also looks better on the left side), this is one of the reasons why 99% of the photos on my blog and Instagram are of my left side – it’s my good side. We all have a “good side”, right? Plus, I feel like my dark circles are worse in my right eye so it always makes me look more tired.
My thighs.
I have a pear-shaped body which means I have a bigger butt and thighs and a smaller upper body. That used to bother me so much – and it still does every now and then, to be honest – but I’ve learned to work with what I’ve got. Especially when it comes to style and finding the pieces that work better on my body type.
Trust me, it can be quite the challenge to find the right pair of jeans. As I have to go bigger so that the jeans fit my hips and legs, that means they’re always a bit lose on my waist.
My shyness.
When it comes to personality traits, shyness was the first thing that popped into my head.
Shyness is something I’ve dealt with my whole life. I’m also a huge introvert so that makes up an interesting combination. However, I don’t mind being an introvert, and finally understanding what that meant brought me peace and joy. In case you don’t know, extroverts recharge batteries by hanging out with others while introverts recharge by being alone. Shyness is more about the fear of social judgment. Although introversion and shyness are not similar concepts, they sometimes overlap, which is my case.
While I enjoy being an introvert, I really dislike my shyness because it has kept me from doing/saying a lot of things.
[box-1 align=”left”]When you think about your insecurities in your head, it all sounds like such a big deal but writing them down or even saying them out loud makes you realized how trivial they are. I’ve been a little too hard on myself. However, we’re human and everyone has the right to have their own insecurities – I’m sure even a Victoria Secret’s model has! At the same time, I am very grateful for my body and never take it for granted.[/box-1]
My Perfections.
My collarbone.
This might sound like a weird one but I actually heard quite a few people mentioning this as one of their favorite things about themselves so here you have it!
I just find that collar bones – and also shoulders – can be super elegant and I really like how prominent mine are. That said, I enjoy wearing tops that showcase it – during Summer, of course, because now it’s too cold for that.
My eyelashes.
While I kind of wish I had my mom’s green eyes, I’m pretty content with my shade of brown as well as my long and voluminous lashes – thanks, dad! It’s something that I get complimented on quite often and it always makes me proud!
My skin.
Another thing I like about myself is my skin. Growing up, I saw my girlfriends struggle with acne and other skin issues and sometimes I feared that I would be free from it during my teenage years only to see it breaking out like crazy once I hit my twenties. Fortunately, that didn’t happen. While I had the occasional breakout every now and then, I feel very grateful for not dealing with any major skin problems.
My empathy.
When it comes to a personality trait, I would say my empathy. I can easily put myself in someone else’s shoes and understand both points of views in a situation. And I feel like that’s a great and useful trait to have. Sometimes it’s important to be sensitive to what others are feeling and being able to show compassion towards them.
I loved reading this post – it really helped me tie together how much I (and how people in general) focus so much on negatives, and little ones at that! I did a similar exercise recently and found it so beneficial to be open with myself. Writing about what we love about ourselves is a great way to embrace positivity, but I also felt that writing about my imperfections, and my physical features that I don’t like, were also very helpful. When I started writing, I felt the need to explain why I felt a certain way about myself, which gave me insight into my own reasoning. Now I can say that I’ve put some of my own criticisms to rest, and just as you said, I realize how trivial those things really are.
Thank you, Julie 🙂 I get what you’re saying, it was surprisingly helpful! When I thought about writing about my imperfections, I thought it would make me feel more insecure and even sad. It’s like when there’s something going on but you don’t want to talk about it and pretend it doesn’t exist. But it was actually the opposite. Writing about them made me realize how silly and insignificant they are in the grand scheme of things. x
That was a great post, I really think life gets easier if we appreciate those little things we don’t love about ourselves.
Thank you!! I definitely agree 🙂 x
It is so normal to have our insecurities. The secret is to keep finding things we love about ourselves and focus on them much more. For example, I really dont like the fact that i have an eye smaller than the other. People notice it much more when I am tired. I was made fun of when I was a kid. My colleagues would call me “Luís de Camões” – so you can imagine how i felt about it.
I am still very sensitive about it if people ever bring it up. It is funny how things that happened years ago can affect you so much.
Lots of love, Lisa.
The Lisa’s World
I understand, as much as you want to forget it, it’s still there in the back of your mind. But yes, we all have things we would like to change about ourselves but they are part of us and I guess we have to learn how to accept them. And as you said, it’s much better to focus on what we do love about ourselves. Enough of negativity 🙂 xx
LOVE LOVE LOVE this post! We all have things that we don’t like about ourselves but its so improtant to look at things you do love
http://www.petiteelliee.com
Ellie xx
Thank you, so happy to know you enjoyed it 🙂 x