Far too often we rely on others to give us the motivation to pursue our goals and dreams. As if we need some kind of validation that we can actually achieve them. But not everyone will understand your dreams. And it doesn’t always mean that they don’t believe in you. They’re most likely projecting their own realities or insecurities onto you. That’s why we must learn how to be our own cheerleaders.
My Story.
I am a dreamer. I’ve always been and always will. I also struggle a lot with self-doubt and often have a hard time believing in myself. That makes an interesting combination, doesn’t it?
As much as I hate to admit it, I expect others to validate my dreams and my ability to achieve them.
For instance, it’s hard for my parents to understand some of my dreams. I know they always have my back and support me no matter what but I don’t think they really believe that I can do it. They want to believe that I can but deep down they don’t. That’s because they projecting their own realities onto me.
One of the reasons why I’m thankful for the blogging world is because it opened my eyes to possibility. It’s so refreshing and empowering to read other people’s stories: from people making money from their blogs to starting their own successful businesses. That showed me that yes, that is possible. And if they can do it, I can do it, too.
My parent’s reality is much different though. They’re used to working for the same company for the last 30+ years, surrounded by people who are not passionate about their jobs. That’s why it can be hard for them to believe in a different reality.
How I’m Learning To Be My Own Cheerleader
Often we don’t celebrate our own accomplishments unless someone else approves them or we don’t go after a dream because others don’t believe we can make it a reality. But we don’t need a fan club, we can be our own motivation. That said, here’s how I’m learning to be my own cheerleader.
Write a reverse bucket list.
A couple of months ago I came across the concept of a reverse bucket list and decided to write mine. Here’s something I took from it: when you take the time to count your accomplishments, you realize that you have a bunch of things to feel proud of. Setting goals can help you move forward, but it’s also important to not lose sight of all the things you’ve achieved so far. It will give you more motivation to keep moving forward.
Work on my positive self-talk.
Being your own cheerleader means learning to talk more kindly to yourself. When you keep saying the same things to yourself over and over again, you start believing in them. So that’s why it’s important to be mindful of your self-talk and make sure it is positive. It’s easier said than done but trust me, it’s worth the effort. And that’s why I want to keep working on silencing my inner critic in 2018.
Pretend I am my best friend.
Would you say to your best friend what you say to yourself? I definitely wouldn’t and that’s what I’m trying to remember when working on my self-talk. We can be so hard on ourselves and after years doing it, we see it as normal. So next time you’re putting yourself down, ask yourself: What would I say to motivate my best friend? Then say it to yourself.
“Somedays you just have to create your own sunshine.”
That is so hard. I want to self-motivate myself to do things I need to do, but I can’t seem to get it through my head! Lol! Sigh.
By the way, I found your blog from an article on Pinterest. So happy I found your blog. It looks amazing! 🙂
I also have those days quite frequently where motivation is nowhere to be found but these three things usually help 🙂 Thank you, that really means a lot!! xx
I listen to affirmations daily. I try to always have some sort of affirmation or motivational music playing quietly in the background. My goal is to bypass my conscious awareness and get to the subconscious because that is where real change begins.
I wish everyone much success in receiving the level of encouragement they desire.
That’s a great tip! I’ve heard so many great things about affirmations but haven’t tried it myself. Need to change that 🙂 Thank you! x
This post is really great! I feel like as women we are told and expected not to be upfront with the fact that we like ourselves. It’s so important to really root for yourself because at the end of the day, you’ll be one of the few people that want you to succeed. Thanks for this post!
You’re welcome! I completely agree with you, it’s so important to be our own cheerleaders. xx
Joana, I totally relate to this – I’m going to keep this post open in my tabs and refer to it as I do my reverse bucket list. Thanks for the reminder 🙂
You’re welcome!! I’m happy to know you’re doing it 🙂 x
I love this post, and I can completely relate. I’m trying to be my own biggest fan as well at the moment but it’s taking a bit longer than expected! 24 years of being the opposite can do that to you!
I like the idea of a reverse bucket list, might have inspired my own next blog post! Think I’m going to give mine a go now!
Bekki – beksky.wordpress.com
I definitely get what you’re saying. We get so used to being our worst critic that we kind of forget how to be supportive and kind to ourselves. As for the reverse bucket list, you should do it. I loved writing mine 🙂 x
The reverse bucket list sounds like an interesting idea really! I might try it!
Blog: The Lisa’s World | Instagram | Twitter
You should! I really enjoyed writing mine 🙂 x
I LOVE this post! Sometimes its so important to be able to support yourself!
http://www.petiteelliee.com
Ellie xx
Thank you 🙂 It really is! x
I couldn’t relate to this any more if I tried! My parents are supportive, but they don’t exactly believe in my dreams or what I want. I think they see it as unrealistic. But the blogging world has definitely helped me believe in going after what you want and believing that your dreams can come true. Thanks so much for writing this. I’m loving your blog at the moment. It’s wonderful!xx
Lauren – itslaurenvictoria.blogspot.co.uk
Aww thank you so much for your lovely words, it means a lot 🙂 Let’s be our own cheerleaders then!! x