Far too often we rely on others to give us the motivation to pursue our goals and dreams. As if we need some kind of validation that we can actually achieve them. But not everyone will understand your dreams. And it doesn’t always mean that they don’t believe in you. They’re most likely projecting their own realities or insecurities onto you. That’s why we must learn how to be our own cheerleaders.
I am a dreamer. I’ve always been and always will. I also struggle a lot with self-doubt and often have a hard time believing in myself. That makes an interesting combination, doesn’t it?
As much as I hate to admit it, I expect others to validate my dreams and my ability to achieve them.
For instance, it’s hard for my parents to understand some of my dreams. I know they always have my back and support me no matter what but I don’t think they really believe that I can do it. They want to believe that I can but deep down they don’t. That’s because they projecting their own realities onto me.
One of the reasons why I’m thankful for the blogging world is because it opened my eyes to possibility. It’s so refreshing and empowering to read other people’s stories: from people making money from their blogs to starting their own successful businesses. That showed me that yes, that is possible. And if they can do it, I can do it, too.
My parent’s reality is much different though. They’re used to working for the same company for the last 30+ years, surrounded by people who are not passionate about their jobs. That’s why it can be hard for them to believe in a different reality.
How I’m Learning To Be My Own Cheerleader
Often we don’t celebrate our own accomplishments unless someone else approves them or we don’t go after a dream because others don’t believe we can make it a reality. But we don’t need a fan club, we can be our own motivation. That said, here’s how I’m learning to be my own cheerleader.
Write a reverse bucket list.
A couple of months ago I came across the concept of a reverse bucket list and decided to write mine. Here’s something I took from it: when you take the time to count your accomplishments, you realize that you have a bunch of things to feel proud of. Setting goals can help you move forward, but it’s also important to not lose sight of all the things you’ve achieved so far. It will give you more motivation to keep moving forward.
Work on my positive self-talk.
Being your own cheerleader means learning to talk more kindly to yourself. When you keep saying the same things to yourself over and over again, you start believing in them. So that’s why it’s important to be mindful of your self-talk and make sure it is positive. It’s easier said than done but trust me, it’s worth the effort. And that’s why I want to keep working on silencing my inner critic in 2018.
Pretend I am my best friend.
Would you say to your best friend what you say to yourself? I definitely wouldn’t and that’s what I’m trying to remember when working on my self-talk. We can be so hard on ourselves and after years doing it, we see it as normal. So next time you’re putting yourself down, ask yourself: What would I say to motivate my best friend? Then say it to yourself.
“Somedays you just have to create your own sunshine.”